Have you ever felt really good about yourself – and you’re just kind of coasting along in your own happiness – then WHAM!
They make a comment that contradicts how you feel about yourself and then you start second guessing who you are all over the place.
Is it true? Should I be nicer or more attractive or smarter? If he/she doesn’t like this about me, then I shouldn’t like this about me. If he/she doesn’t like me then I shouldn’t like me. I don’t like me. I wish I were different.
Allow me to reveal some synonyms of the word perfect: faultless, beyond compare, defectless, expert, foolproof, immaculate, pure, supreme, boring.
Yes, boring! And exhausting!
How much work must it take to be “perfect”? And once you got there, how hard would it be to maintain?
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to feel like I have to work that hard for something so fragile and fleeting. All it would take is one slight inexact move, and “perfect” would spiral wildly out of it’s pristine state of being.
Into what? Well, we like to call that state imperfect, don’t we?
Let me expose what the word imperfect is synonymous with; broken, damaged, defective, deficient, flawed, garbage, incomplete, junk, limited….
Who comes up with this stuff anyway?
The thing is, words can’t possibly describe who we are. When we use words to describe who we are, we are limiting ourselves (or allowing others to limit us).
We are “perfect” and we are “not so perfect”. And we are everything in between, as well.
But the truth is, we really just feel. We experience feelings of generosity sometimes. We experience feelings of overwhelm sometimes. Also happiness, sadness, compassion, anger, etc.
Feelings are much more complex than mere words. But even they don’t define who we are, but the states of Being we are in at any given moment.
We can BE happiness. We can BE annoying. We can BE fear. We can BE love.
Since our states of being change from one moment to the next, we are not our feelings either.
What are we then?
I don’t really know. But we are Be-ing.
We are Beings.
Allow me to introduce you to some synonyms for what a Being is: presence, essential nature, entity, essence, marrow, quintessence, self, soul, spirit, substance…
Being is defined as “the fact of existing.” We exist.
I can’t find any limitations there, can you?
Let’s not define ourselves. Or let anyone else define us either.
But if we have to, then “perfect” is a pretty good definition, as long as we understand that “perfect” means we were made to be everything.
Shared with Love, by Denise Barry. For more on Denise, click here .
Hi I’m Karen Salmansohn, founder of NotSalmon. My mission is to offer you easy-to-understand insights and tools to empower you to bloom into your happiest, highest potential self. I use playful analogies, feisty humor, and stylish graphics to distill big ideas – going as far back as ancient wisdom from Aristotle, Buddhism and Darwin to the latest research studies from Cognitive Therapy, Neuro Linquistic Programming, Neuroscience, Positive Psychology, Quantum Physics, Nutritional Studies – and then some.